Key Takeaways
- 1Grandparent scams steal an average of $9,000 per victim
- 2Scammers use social media to research family details
- 3They exploit love and urgency to bypass rational thinking
- 4Always verify by calling the grandchild at a known number
- 5Establish a family code word for emergencies
- 6Never send money via wire transfer or gift cards
- 7It's okay to hang up - real family understands caution
Warning Signs to Watch For
Recovery Steps
Stop all contact
Hang up immediately. Do not send any money or gift cards. If you've already sent something, stop any additional payments.
Verify the story
Call your actual grandchild at their known phone number. Contact their parents. Do not use any number provided by the scammer.
Report the scam
File reports with local police, FTC (reportfraud.ftc.gov), and FBI's IC3. This helps track and stop scammers.
Contact financial institutions
If you wired money, contact your bank immediately. If you sent gift cards, contact the retailer. Recovery is rare but possible if acted quickly.
Protect yourself going forward
Set up a family code word. Limit personal information on social media. Tell friends about the scam to protect them.
How the Grandparent Scam Works
The grandparent scam exploits the powerful bond between grandparents and grandchildren. Criminals impersonate a grandchild in distress, creating panic that bypasses your normal skepticism.
- The call - A scammer calls, often late at night, and says "Grandma?" When you say a name, they confirm it.
- The emergency - They claim they're in jail, had an accident, are stuck abroad, or in the hospital.
- The request - They need money immediately - for bail, medical bills, or to get home.
- The secrecy - "Please don't tell Mom and Dad - they'll be so mad at me."
- The payment - Wire transfer, gift cards, cash by courier, or cryptocurrency - untraceable methods.
- The escalation - Once you've paid, they may call back with more "emergencies."
AI Makes It Worse
New AI voice technology can clone anyone's voice from social media videos. Scammers may actually sound exactly like your grandchild. Verification is more important than ever.
Warning Signs of a Scam
These red flags should immediately make you suspicious:
- Urgency - Scammers create panic so you don't have time to think clearly.
- Secrecy - "Don't tell anyone" prevents you from verifying with other family.
- Unusual payment method - Wire transfers, gift cards, and crypto are untraceable.
- Fishing for information - "Grandma?" and waiting for you to provide the name.
- Story inconsistencies - Details change or don't make sense.
- Pressure to act NOW - They won't let you hang up and call back.
- Caller ID spoofing - The number may look like it's from your grandchild or their area.
| Red Flag | What Scammers Say | What to Do |
|---|---|---|
| Urgency | "I need the money in the next hour" | Hang up and verify independently |
| Secrecy | "Don't tell Mom, she'll kill me" | Call the parents immediately |
| Payment method | "Send me gift cards from Walmart" | No legitimate emergency needs gift cards |
| Voice sounds off | "I have a cold / bad connection" | Ask personal questions only they'd know |
How to Protect Yourself
These strategies can prevent you from becoming a victim:
- 1Establish a family code word - A secret word only family knows, to verify identity in emergencies.
- 2Always verify independently - Hang up and call your grandchild at their known number.
- 3Don't trust caller ID - Numbers can be spoofed to look like they're from anyone.
- 4Ask personal questions - "What did we do at your last birthday?" Real grandchildren know.
- 5Take your time - Scammers create urgency. Real emergencies allow time to verify.
- 6Limit social media information - Scammers research families online. Set profiles to private.
- 7Tell friends about scams - Spreading awareness protects your community.
The Family Code Word
Choose a random word that only family knows - like "pineapple" or "bluebird." In any emergency, the family member must say the code word to prove identity.
If You've Been Scammed
If you've already sent money, act quickly:
- Wire transfer - Contact your bank immediately. International wires may be recoverable if caught fast.
- Gift cards - Call the retailer (Walmart, Target, etc.) with the card numbers. Sometimes funds can be frozen.
- Cash courier - If someone is coming to pick up cash, call police immediately.
- Cryptocurrency - Report to FBI's IC3, but recovery is unlikely.
- Report everywhere - Local police, FTC, FBI IC3, and state Attorney General.
- Don't be embarrassed - These criminals are professionals. Many smart people fall victim.
You're Not Alone
Thousands of grandparents fall victim to this scam every year. The criminals are sophisticated and exploit your love for family. Reporting helps stop them from hurting others.
Protecting Elderly Family Members
If you're concerned about a parent or grandparent being targeted:
- Have the conversation - Explain the scam in detail. Rehearse what they'll say.
- Establish the code word - Make sure everyone in the family knows it.
- Program phone numbers - Your contact info should be easy to find.
- Monitor for signs - Sudden wire transfers, gift card purchases, or secrecy about calls.
- No shame - Make clear they should call you before sending money - no judgment.
- Call blocking - Consider call-blocking services that filter unknown numbers.
- Limit social media - Help them understand what information scammers can use.
Helpful Resources
FTC Report Fraud
Federal Trade Commission fraud reporting portal
FBI IC3
Internet Crime Complaint Center for online fraud
AARP Fraud Watch Network
Free helpline and fraud prevention resources
877-908-3360
Visit websiteAdult Protective Services
State-level agency for elder abuse. Search for your state's office.
Protecting Your Real Wealth
Scammers target liquid assets that can be quickly transferred. Physical gold and silver in a secure depository can't be wire-transferred to criminals.
- Physical precious metals can't be stolen through phone scams
- Gold IRA assets are held in secure, insured depositories
- No wire transfers or gift cards involved
- Real wealth protection from many threats
- Assets under your name, with proper verification
Frequently Asked Questions
How do scammers know my grandchild's name?
Often, they don't. They call and say "Grandma? It's me, your grandson" and wait for you to say a name. They also research social media - family photos, birthdays, school names, and location tags provide details they use to seem legitimate.
Why do they ask for gift cards?
Gift cards are essentially untraceable cash. Once you read the numbers to the scammer, they drain the funds within minutes. Wire transfers and cryptocurrency are similarly hard to trace and nearly impossible to recover.
Should I engage with scammers to waste their time?
While some people enjoy "scam baiting," it's generally not recommended. It keeps you on the phone longer, you might accidentally reveal personal information, and it doesn't meaningfully stop the operation. Just hang up.
Can I get my money back if I was scammed?
Recovery is rare but possible if you act immediately. Wire transfers may be reversible within 24-48 hours. Gift card funds may be frozen if reported quickly. File reports with all agencies - sometimes law enforcement recovers funds in larger investigations.
How can I tell if it's really my grandchild calling?
Ask questions only they would know: "What's your dog's name?" "What did we do last Thanksgiving?" "What's our family code word?" A scammer won't know these answers. Better yet, hang up and call your grandchild directly at a number you know.